is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
