also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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