some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
