u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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