she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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