I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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