that's an acceptable place to lick
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
is it fun? or sober?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
