when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
