Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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