I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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