It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
