I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
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Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
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I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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