For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize