k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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