I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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