you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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