I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
