you're like a bully in the Christmas story
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
being pregnant is like rehab
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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