You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
