So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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