nut hugger
we have officially lost it.
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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