Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
