I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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