he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
