in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
