i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
