OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Randomize
