I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize