these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
