Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
