hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
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