She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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