It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
