Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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