Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
