Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize