everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize