ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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