oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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