bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
