I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
These tits shall not be calmed
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
