these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
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We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
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He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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