I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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