You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Randomize
