tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
