It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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