4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
