chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize