College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
