Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
